1. |
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HAMLET'S CONUNDRUM
(adapted from William Shakespeare)
Well, thatʼs the question:
to be, or not to be?
Is it noble in the mind to take arms against a sea of ceaseless troubles
and, by opposing, end them?
To die.
To Sleep.
To sleep perchance to dream.
ʻTil we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause.
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2. |
DYING DAYS (EP version)
05:01
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DYING DAYS
This is my dying day
or, rather, I should say
that every day we're dying.
So why
do I fear regret
instead of brightly raging
like a ripe supernova?
If I die of old age
write “Pussy” on my tombstone.
But if I go in a blaze
send me off with rabid cheers!
This could be the
Last night we will breathe.
So damn our doubts and
letʼs drink and dance and scream.
Iʼm a vapor in the breeze
or, rather, what I mean is
that greatness hasn't claimed me.
Oh, I want to ignite myself
To become a beacon
in a world thatʼs choked with fog.
I want to be a martyr
for any cause with passion.
Just need to find a target
for my kamikaze heart.
This could be the
Last night we will breathe.
So damn our doubts and
letʼs smoke and kiss and scream.
The past
is only dead ash.
The futureʼs faint smoke.
So I must burn today.
Still, I must admit
this ephemeral existence
it scares the shit
out of me.
If I die of old age
write “Pussy” on my tombstone.
But if I go in a blaze
send me off with rabid cheers!
This could be the
Last night we will breathe.
So damn our doubts and
letʼs fuck and fight and scream.
These could be the
Last words I will speak.
So damn my doubts and
god save my dignity.
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3. |
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CORE EXPOSURE
Her tears
were like magnets
yanking my bone dry tongue
past smoke-yellowed enamel crags.
And she asked,
“What do you think is the meaning of life—
the reason for all this frustration and strife?”
And I said, “To hurt without hurting;
to sustain unsustainable love.”
“That makes no sense!” she cried.
I said, “I know—
it’s called a paradox.
And that’s the only sort of answer
we can hope for in this world.”
And then
to squelch
the lump in my own throat
I pulled her closer—
as close as we could get.
And as the air between us shallowed,
so did the skin,
and our skulls sounded off
the wonton mating calls
of manicured finger nails
and dusty chalkboards
And our foreheads sweat one sweat.
And our vessels bled one blood.
“Maybe,” she said,
“This is it—
just being together—
the meaning of life, I mean.”
“Tandem emoting,”
I quipped against her lips.
And in such proximity
I could feel, hear, see her breath:
her exhalations scented like
exhausted bubblegum.
And I wanted to chew her cheeks off
and burrow into her—
into her blackness,
and later I did.
And later, when eyes were dry
and wet panties were crumpled
on the floor,
I stared into
the photographic irises of idols on my wall.
I tried to
remember what it felt like back when I was worth anything at all.
I listened
for the absent summons of a reliable future.
And I wondered what
sadistic property of fate or physics has frozen
her potential
in this igloo of my
failure-stained sheets
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4. |
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HOW TO ESCAPE A BURDENSOME ROUTINE OF OBSESSION, DESPAIR, AND GENERAL MALAISE
Oh, your life
is a tidal wave
and mineʼs a splintering home.
Letʼs go to Miami
and uproot our troubles
with hurricanes
Letʼs go.
Who needs doors
and windows anyway?
You always see through me
like Iʼm naked,
or lacquered in shame. Or
like Iʼm wearing my skin inside-out.
Iʼm a Hellraiser.
Momma gave birth to a natural disaster.
Iʼm a cantankerous archangel
bottling defiant souls.
I keep your essence confined
in an air tight Holy Grail.
One of these days
Iʼm going to punch a hole in your chest
and free your blood
from its repetitious route.
My jailbar ribs
keep our hearts from colliding.
Letʼs go
to Miami
and uproot our troubles
with open arteries...
open arteries.
Letʼs go.
Death by collision
is such a cliché.
Instead letʼs drain our futile pain.
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